The StuSie

Eine Woche als Englischassistent: Teil 1; Das Wochenende

In response to a request from a fellow blogger who has only appeared to us very occasionally in the comment section of the blog (I won't name names, Colby) I've decided to document my activities (or non-activities) for the week, not to annoy or make jealous those who have 9 to 5 jobs or those who leaf through the legislative Kram of the US justice system, but simply to give all y'all a glimpse into life in Irdning, life in Austria, life in a particularly sparesly populated valley in the middle of Europe. Ich hoffe, dass es wenigstens halbwegs interessant ist...also, fang' ma' an...

Das Wochenende

Freitag, 3. Februar:

Before I begin with the events of Friday, a note about my weekly schedule. I am contracted to work 12 hours per week at two different schools, one in Stainach (a gymnasium) and one in Liezen (a school for future kindergarten teachers...about 350 girls and a guy). Friday is a wild card day. If I have nothing going on, I offer to come in for an hour, but if I request a day off, I can count on it being granted. So this Friday was one of those free Fridays, because I was going to krieg Besuch. Dirk von Schneidemesser was en route from Freiburg, where he is suffering through his own hectic schedule.

06.15 -- A typical time for me to wake up. It's dark, it's cold, and there's no bus to the train station (a total of about 4 buses run from Irdning to Stainach train station during the course of the whole day). I lace up the boots and trudge out into fog you can taste. It's like walking through really cold jello. It's about a 45 minute walk, and by the time I reach the station, my beard, coat, face, headphones, u.s.w. are covered in ice from the moisture in the air. Dirk arrives, and we eat an unhealthy breakfast. One of the four buses takes us home to Irdning.

11.45 -- We sleep, eat lunch, then board the Gratis Bus to the Planneralm. Strahlende Sonnenschein greet us, but new powder fehlt. I'm skiing injured, and apparently am incapable of taking it easy and proceed to take a wicked digger, re-wrenching my back as Dirk laughs.

17.00 -- The plan is eisstockschießen (curling without the broom) and rodeln (basically sledding on EPO or Andro or whatever). You take the skilift up the hill and scream down a 7 km long trail on an old fashioned sled with metal runners. 8B, the matura class from Stainach, would be the company. I drive the A3 with authority to Schladming with Ms. Stocker, Dirk, and Jen (Kajenje Ubija), where we sup and consume a bottle of wine.

19.30 -- Eisstockschießen. Glühwein.

22.00 -- Arrival at Hochwurzen, the ski hill. We proceed to get raped at the Liftkasse. One trip up costs € 12. Fucking profiteers I tell you. Kajenje U. shows signs of brain decay on the way up by rythmically rocking her head (or maybe she's just scared out of her wits, but I'm banking on the former). We proceed to skull about a half dozen Halben and a round or two of Schnapps, play some Austrian card games on cards where there's seasons instead of suits, and the barkeep begins to look pissed. It's almost twelve, and their hours state that they're open till 23.00. Eins geht sich noch aus, gel'?

24.10 -- Abfahrt. Floodlights guide the way down. 7 km to go. Drunken highjinks ensue. Kanjenje and Dirk have some beginner's luck on the Rodel.

00.17 -- Lights out. Midway down the Strecke the flood lights fail, and we drunk drive the sleds 3.5 km to the valley and only lose two members of the group, who ended up going down the wrong run and ended up at a different Talstation.

00.45 -- The party rolls on. Teachers and students drunk alike. Drunken kegeln. 'We will Rock You' is the highlight of the evening. Austrian's love Queen.

03.30 -- Lights out at Vera's apartment.

Saturday, 4. Februar:

09.00 -- I, the early riser, walk into town to retrieve the car that was grudgingly left at the bar for obvious safety reasons.

11.15 -- Departure in the A3 for Graz

14.30 -- Treffpunkt with Morsch in the Hauptplatz in Graz after a debacle of aimless wandering looking for Vera's apartment and Dirk dropping a nasty one on the shelf and making the already pungeant apartment smell even worse, which has been put at our disposal for the weekend. Morsch looks comically European in his green trench and ear-flapped cap waiting outside the Rathaus.

14.35 -- Döner and pizza

15.30 -- Billiard spielen. Sloppy as all hell. 3 games take an hour and a half.

21.00 -- More boozin' with other assistants

03.00 -- Lights out in the smelly apartment near the Graz prison.

Sunday, 5. Februar:

11.00 -- We wake and stuff ourselves silly with Chinese food and debate a Döner after that, but Morsch needs to catch the train.

15.30 -- Arrival back in the Ennstal after another great cruise in the A3. S, S, and S for me, then a nap. Dirk leaves at 20.30, after yet another Döner and Pizza. I need to nehm ab solely because of this weekend.

Monday, 6. Februar:

07.30 -- Lion Cereal and die Presse greets me at the kitchen table, then I drive (still in the A3) to school.

08.50 - 12.00 -- Work (?!). Three hours of Unterricht, one about past tense, one where I did absolutely nothing, and another where I watched the kids do a role play.

13.30 -- Back home. Lunch. Book. Sleep. Jog.

20.15 -- Die Millionenshow with Armin Assinger, followed by CSI Miami (seriously, what am I doing with my life?).

21.30 -- Sweet Schlaf

posted by der Mistfink @ 04:07