The StuSie

Im Kino mit Stefan Staubsauger

Ja Haaaallo, ich bins: der Staubsauger, der Stefan.
I don't actually get to the Kino very much, given that it costs more to go see a big studio film that it does to produce many independent ones, but somehow I manage to catch some releases nonetheless. Lately I've seen March of the Penguins and Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story. La Marche de l'empereur as it was known au François, is all about how penguins, the world's wierdest fish, undertake an annual hike across Antartica to have sex and make more penguins. Apparently they choose to do this because the ice is thicker further inland and the babies don't fall in the water when it gets melty in the summer. Because of the time involved and the distance they travel, it means that the mom and pop have to take turns starving and freezing. So, to recap: emperor penguins have it tough. They walk for weeks on end across the world's largest desert without stopping so that they may spend months on end standing out in the wind in the middle of nowhere during the antartic winter without food. Despite all this walking they are poorly built for bipedal locomotion. They are considered birds but cannot fly. When they're not undergoing their miserable parade (that's probably a redundancy since I have yet to see a parade that wasn't miserable) they live in the ocean but they cannot breath underwater. Penguins are nature's most massively inconvenienced creature. That's basically the take-home message in this flick.

The Family Guy's recent foray onto the silver screen entitled "Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story," is a basically a 90 minute episode of the show. I'd heard mixed reviews before I saw it, but I have to say I thought it was pretty good. You kinda hafta give 'em a break since it would be almost impossible to keep up the show's pace for that long and still deliver the number of laughs per minute we're used to. Given that, I'd say it's definitely worth seeing since Family Guy is right up there with the best shows on TV and the movie is certainly better than most of the tripeHollywoodd is churning out.
The main advantage to the movie over the show is that they could cut loose the swears and the innuendo, and that they most certainly did. It's a little disarming to see the now familiar characters throwing around the expletives like Dennis Leary, but pretty damn funny too. The best part is most certainly the weatherman with the "adopted pet of the week" segment. It's pretty fast, so you might miss it if you're still laughing at something else, but it's classic. In sum, meine Meinung nach, check it out for sure.

One last piece of entertainment news I want to mention grabbed headlines on CNN.com yesterday, cementing that outlet's already solid reputation for furthering the decline of actual journalism by pandering to the American People's lowest common denominator - the hunger for celebrity gossip. In this case, I use the term celebrity very loosely indeed. In fact, the so-called news had to do with the dude who wore the Chewbacca suit in Star Wars. The guy in the wookie outfit. Seriously, what the fuck?
According to the article, he married some Texan and has now become a U.S. Citizen. Apparently Chewie was until recently British, which is odd because as I recall his teeth were fine but the amount of hair always led me to believe he was Italian. How this qualifies as news worthy of international dissemination I have no idea. Perhaps the only thing of note is that this guy somehow manages to be uglier without the space monster costume. Chewbacca always looked like an animated version of something fished out of a giant shower drain, but this dude isn't TV ugly, or even Walmart ugly, he's circus ugly. Now that, I suppose, is newsworthy.

posted by Der Staubsauger @ 23:05