The StuSie

Turkey: The giant impoverished Muslim nation that could

One of the most interesting developments in European politics in the past month has been the successful opening of EU accession talks with Turkey. This is an unbelievably big step, in what direction remains to be seen. Personally I've always been a European Federalist at heart and I have always viewed enlargement as both a necessary and inevitable part of the overall Federalist plan for Europe. There are those who do not share my enthusiasm however - I'm looking at you Osterreich - and those that appear to on the surface but harbor deep-seated skepticism just below their progressive exteriors. To be fair, the number of Europeans who oppose Turkish membership is both large and geographically disparate. While Austria certainly made a lot of people hold their collective breath on October 3rd, their concerns are echoed all around the continent. Valery Giscard D'estang, the former French president is one high profile opponent who is of the opinion that Turkey's admission would spell the end for Europe. I am of the opinion that he has a girl's name and the balls to match. Seriously, sack up Valery, Europe has been in a constant state of flux for as long as people have bothered to keep track of things like flux. Honestly, this is a man who fought with the French resistance during the Zweite Weltkreig, and now he's arguing that letting Turkey in to the common market would ruin the beautiful thing that France and Germany had going. Not bloody likely.
In fairness however, there are of course very real and solid arguments against Turkish membership. The big one that gets kicked around all the time is the fact that it's a Muslim country. This much is true, and what's more, the conservative government that has done so much to push, pull and drag the country down the path to accession has a very real and potentially scary theological bent in the Islamic direction. Just look at the recent (thankfully unsuccessful) attempt to criminalize adultery. I mean, getting stoned and cheating on your spouse as a result is one thing, but the other way around, now that's HARSH. Luckily, public outcry has tabled that issue at least for the time being.
Another reasonable argument against Turkei is that it's big and poor. The big part is worrisome because at current population growth rates it would overtake Germany as Europe's big papa as soon as 2020, giving it a lot of sway. On the other hand, its size could potentially help restore the EU to a more even collection of big and small states. It started as 3 big and 3 small, but now it's more like 6 big and 19 small. The fact that it's poor is of course a concern since nobody likes sharing, least of all the French. I mention the French not just because they stink like onions, which of course they do, but because Greg is at least part French now. Seriously though, the French have always been greedy about the CAP and it's unfuckinglikely that they're going to want to give a giant largely agricultural country like Turkey anything like their fair share of the bloated subsidy program that is the common agricultural policy. The majority of Turks however, claim to be much more interested in availing themselves of foreign direct investment than of handouts from Brussels, but time will be the test of that.

There are also very good arguments for Turkey as an EU memberstate, and potentially the best one stems from the very fact that tops the list of complaints. Turkey's identification as a Muslim nation would give the EU a certain "diversity club" feel that it's currently lacking. This is Europe's big chance to show The West (although I'm not referring to any hegemony in particular) that the Us/Them divide does not actually fall neatly along religious lines, as convenient as that would be.
Another possible advantage to Turkish membership would be that it would make it much harder for any one country to hijack direction of the group. I must admit however, that hijacking has historically been the only way to get anything done, and close to equal representation and authority could have Weimaresque repercussions.

What I really wanted to talk about though, was the effect that the new groβe Koalition could potentially have on the Turkish expansion. Ms. Merkel, along with having all the charm of a red wine hangover, is predictably not a big fan of the whole idea. With her in the hotseat, Germany could well join Austria and throw a big loud naysayers dance party teif im Hochschwarzwald. Let's hope that good old Gerdy (who himself has doubts about Turkey depite his pro-expansion rhetoric) can keep her in check. Until then we'll just have to hope against hope that Angela keeps her clubbing pants in the closet along with her jockstrap.

posted by Der Staubsauger @ 22:00